At 9:00 pm today i started to read “Payar ka Pahla shehar” by Mustansir hussain Tarrar. and it came as a surprise for me that i still am very fluent in urdu reading and completed that novel by 12:am in just one sitting.
The story is settled between a tourist “Sanan”, a half British half French girl “Pascal” and a prostitute “Jennie”.
A story of three days… which seem like years when you read the story and the strength of a relationship that can be built in just moments.
These days i am strongly affected by Love stories, Emotional ones and more importantly i have started to empathize with them.
This feeling is great where you can understand the pain of others and suffer like they were your own. when your heart sinks with the emotions of others and you feel the same pain they are feeling. I love it, i can weep, i can remorse, i can die, i can relate with them all.
Very rarely you find such piece of writings that can grip all of your attention and dont let your mind wonder around. And i suffered, with them and fell in love again. For i always learn new and different aspects of Love over the time that make me fall in love again, suffer again, feel the happiness attached to it, feel the sense of guilt, the pain of love, the jealousy involved. A sense where it is hard for you to share one person with anyone else.
I know out there, there are many people who are blessed with love, and many are cursed with it. Some people manage to live with this fire burning slowly within them but they live.
there was a time when i was unable to understand, this feeling. A feeling when you cant be with your loved ones. and you have to live with this whole of your life.
and you when you accept it, accept it in your heart things become easier, burdens are lighter to carry then.